Dear Governor Jeff Landry,

How's it going? I see you've been in the news a lot lately. Yeah, the 10 Commandments thing, I guess the courts are going to get involved. I know you and Attorney General Murrill saw that coming. It will be interesting to see how that works out.

Sean Foster via Unsplash.com
Sean Foster via Unsplash.com
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Have you heard anything more from Mick Jagger? I know you managed to get his attention when the Rolling Stones played in New Orleans. I am guessing you two haven't met for coffee but if you did, I'd love to hear about the conversation.

Ed BMusic via YouTube WVUE FOX 8 New Orleans via YouTube
Ed BMusic via YouTube WVUE FOX 8 New Orleans via YouTube
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Now, about that whole "live tiger in the stadium" thing from this past weekend. I guess there were a few folks who got upset about that too. I understand one fan of the LSU Tigers actually got into some trouble because of comments made toward you. I do hope they were in fact joking, even if the joke wasn't funny and isn't the kind of thing that adults should be joking about.

McNeese State v LSU
Stacy Revere, Getty Images
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But that got me thinking maybe your idea for last Saturday was really spot on. You just were off by about 50 miles or so, had the wrong weekend, and picked the wrong place. Hear me out, I think you're going to like this Jeff. You might like it even more than that time I had to shut Charles Boustany down during your battle for Congress a few years back.

Jeff Landry (center)
Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images
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So, last week you were adamant that a live tiger be in Tiger Stadium for LSU versus Alabama. The results weren't good all the way around. But this weekend another Louisiana team plays another team from Alabama and here is your chance at redemption.

I think you should demand that the University of Louisiana at Lafayette, or USL when you graduated, should have a LIVE CAJUN in the stadium for Saturday's UL versus South Alabama game. In fact, I think you should go on record as saying "as many Live Cajuns as we can fit in the stands" should be required.

Ragin' Cajuns via Twitter
Ragin' Cajuns via Twitter
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What do you think, Governor?

The Ragin Cajuns football team is kickin' butt this year and I know Coach Desormeaux and the Cajun Football team would love to show off in front of as many LIVE CAJUNS as they can.

There won't be any need for special cages or handlers, I think we can control the Cajuns with an abundance of $2 Natural Light Beer and an old-fashioned ass whuppin' on the Jaguars of South Al.

YouTube via Natural Light
YouTube via Natural Light
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Just in case you need to make some phone calls you can tell the LIVE CAJUNS they need to be at Cajun Field in Lafayette on Saturday afternoon. The game kicks off at 6 pm. It's a Black Out Game, so they need to wear their black Cajuns gear, white rubber boots will still be allowed if they're from Vermilion Parish.

So, they'd need to be at the stadium by 9 that morning to begin tailgating. Tell them to bring black iron pots, burners, and whatever they want to cook.  And if they run short of supplies, Rouses is right across the street. 

Rouses Market
Rouses Market
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By the way, if someone from Northwestern State asks you about a similar in-stadium mascot for their next home game, I'd pass on that, we don't need any more Demons in Louisiana. I hear they put tomatoes in their gumbo.

Respectfully,

That guy Billy Nungesser won't talk to.

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